Looking Ahead

The 2014 school year started today in South Africa. I’m nervous about where this next year is going to take me…I started organising my schedule over the weekend and although I’m excited about certain courses, I’m nervous about the amount of responsibility I’ve set for myself. I often end up over-working myself to the point of breakdown by the middle of the year holiday, and after that period is over, I merely restart the cycle and re-stress myself by the year-end. Does it make sense then, to go into that pressure now already, knowing what I will ultimately be doing to my peace-of-mind even if it doesn’t affect me yet? Or should I really believe that I can now cope with that workload and dive in?

I believe that it is good to constantly challenge the mind in its ways of thinking and its level of knowledge, but there is definitely a line between what is healthy and that which is destructive, but how can I decide where that line actually is? I know for every person that it’s different, but for myself, I can’t personally define when I’m thinking too unrealistically, because I’m always striving to attain a higher level and the line always hides in the shadows of everything I want to accomplish.

This in particular cannot be a healthy thing. It is wise to know one’s mental boundaries, but I don’t even know where to look for them, despite knowing exactly when I’ve past and broken them. 2014 is the last year I will be using my current curriculum. Next year I’ll either move on to Cambridge long-distance studies, which affords the necessary accreditation and recognition by universities around South Africa, or I’ll spend my last two high school years at a school or college institution. Before I leave this curriculum, my goal was to complete four maths years, three English, one Biology, and about eight years of Afrikaans all in one year. It was going to be tough but I tested myself with the workload for a little bit and I actually coped with it. At the moment however, I don’t have many of those resources, so I made the decision to work to that level anyway with resources that are available and I took a look through the online, free courses that are offered through the platform Coursera. Therefore over this next year, even if I do not complete all those subjects I had set for myself to learn, I will still be able to work to attain the same level of knowledge, but spread that knowledge out over a large variety of different subjects.

I’m nervous for this next year. I don’t know what it will hold, or where it will take me. I don’t know how far I will be stretched, or whether this ride will be an easy one. But something I can see for this year, is that it is going to be a new one. I’m going to make changes to the way I live, work and even cope with stress, I don’t want to return to the old patterns. I want to do new things, and although I’m scared to break out into something new like this, I’m really excited to see how God is going to build His truths in me during this coming season of life.

Summer Camp 2014 – Amplified

While I was praying I had this picture of a river. The water in this river was flowing strongly, not stopping in the face of the rocks that lay in the river. I felt like, as Christians, we are those stones. The water rushes past us and tries to pull us to the bottom of the hill, but if we have a strong footing in God’s Word, we won’t be swept away downhill with the current. Occasionally we will lose our place, but God will always bring things into our path to bring us back to Him.

Every year as I head off to camp, I wonder if this camp can top the last one. Every year, my mind is blown again as each camp shoots the last off the charts of awesomeness. This camp in particular, I really felt God working in my life in extraordinary ways.

Maybe it’s just because I’ve been in quite a dark place these past couple of months, but I felt God’s power fill me with His freedom more than I’ve ever experienced at a camp before. There was a lot of breakthrough going on for everyone, the amount of tears was unbelievable, but at the same time, there was so much joy. Chains were breaking and every single person was affected, even when they were fighting against being touched by God. Our Lord is incredible and I am so proud to serve him.

There were plenty of special and hilarious moments spread throughout the four days we were away in Grabouw. My favourite being those belonging to the Wally of Camp – OJ, who showered in the girls’ bathroom, under the impression that the girl stuck in the stall had walked into the wrong room…and another unforgettable moment with my Bestie. My boyfriend, myself and a new friend were chatting together, and Kris (Bestie) walked up to the three of us and began chatting with me. Zach (new friend) motioned to Sam (boyfriend) asking if he and myself were together, to which Sam nodded and Kris grabbed on my shoulder, saying “And me!!!” quickly, to cause what is quite literally the most awkward, hilarious moment I’ve had 😀 Shame…that girl…she does that to herself every time I see her, but boy, is it funny  ❤

BlueX